in the months since I wrote you last...

I:

Saw Henry Rollins
Graduated from high school
Played a show with Ghost Mice

In the months to come, I will be:

Moving out of my parents house on July 1st
playing with Math the Band, Iji, and Watercolor Paintings (holy indie pop!) on August 1st at the Haverford Free Library...I think it's at 4? Mark your calendar!
(Hopefully) Doing another show with Toby Foster (this time with his band Arkansas) and Dustin and the Furniture on August 5th. Just need to find a venue...eep.
Putting out a tape on a certain renowned twee label...yikes!

So, in short, sorry about not blogging. No one reads this anyway I don't think but just in case they do, here it is.

Dick Lips: "Who the Hell is DHC?"

It's been an aspiration of mine for quite some time now to start a blink-182 cover band, and now what with all the hype about their upcoming reunion, it seemed like no better time to finally make it happen. Fellow "Dude Ranch" enthusiast Mimi and I sat down with my Salvation Army tape recorder yesterday and recorded four really bumpin tracks as Dick Lips:

1. Waggy
2. Pathetic
3. Dammit
4. Dick Lips

collectively known as the "Who the Hell is DHC?" e.p. You can download it HERE.

Doesn't Mimi sound just like pre-"Enema" Tom Delonge? Don't I sound just like a more morose Mark Hoppus? Yes. and yes.

Holy crap, faafh news!

I'm really sorry about the lack of updates and I know blogs that don't update at least weekly are like mega lame, but there has been an overall lack of activity with Failed Attempts at Facial Hair lately as I've been suffering from severe writers block and mostly playing with a band I'm in with two people from this band.

Expect shows from us sometime this spring. I think we sound pretty good so far. Speaking of shows, I have two coming up not this coming weekend but next. One is 3/6 at the good ol' Kennett high school library, the other is on 3/7 at a big friggin house on north high street in west chester with like a billion bands. I don't really know any of these bands except Bog Buddies (Kyle, who played the "Girls, Friends, and Girlfriends" release show) but it will probably be fun/maybe kind of goofy? who knows? learn more about it via the power of social networking HERE.

Also, I finally got my paypal set up so as to make the album easier to buy. There's a link to it on my Myspace if you're interested. If you're cooler than me and don't use paypal and just do everything by cash, then feel free to message or e-mail me and I will send you my mailing address.

And finally, I was on a nice little podcast my friend matt does called "everything is wonderful" which you can stream/download/read about HERE. Be warned, if talk of genital mutilation upsets you, you may want to skip ahead to my part (except don't because it's funny). I talk about and play a few of my songs and make myself sound really really cool. CHECK IT.

So, in the future: Failed Attempts at Facial Hair EP, summer tour?, zines, graduation, moving out of my parents house, quitting my job, getting a life, and all of those other things I never seem to get around to doing.

Keep in touch/send me a letter/let me know how you're doing!
-John

Definitive top 10 Albums (yes, you care)

I got bored so I did this:

You know how sometimes people will be like "hey, do you think you could name your top 10 (whatever)?" and then everyone will be like "Oh, I don't think I could narrow it down to just 10"? That drives me out my mind. Yes you can. All it takes is some thought. When you say "I don't think I could narrow it down to just 10" what it actually means "I am lazy and afraid of who I really am." FACE YOURSELF. Here are my definitive top 10 albums ever because I live for the day.

1. The Halo Benders-"God Don't Make No Junk"
2. American Football-"S/t"
3. Weston-"Got Beat Up"
4. Lifetime- "Jersey's Best Dancers"
5. The Ergs!- "Dorkrockcorkrod"
6. Descendents- "Milo Goes to College"
7. Dillinger Four- "Situationist Comedy"
8. Magnetic Fields-"Holiday"
9. Mr. T Experience- "Revenge is Sweet and So Are You"
10. Unrest-"Imperial F.F.R.R"

Oh also, today is the last day of the year. Who cares? 2008 was kind of lame. Lots of stuff lined up in 2009 though: graduation, possible tour? college, living on my own, all that jazz. Boring.

If my body permits I'm playing in Joe's garage on Friday. Lots of really rad bands will be there, it should be sweet. Please come.

Fin

you know, as much as I love bands like Lifetime, Crimpshrine, and Rites of Spring-whose music seems tied to a specific time and place-I feel like I'll never be able to fully appreciate them, because I wasn't around to experience the music. I can't take an album like "Jersey's Best Dancers" at face value; for me it serves more as a soundtrack or documentation to a scene or movement that I was never a part of. It will never sound as good in my room in 2008 as it did in a sweaty Jersey basement in 1997.

That's why I'm so bummed about The Ergs! breaking up. This is the only band that I feel accurately represents who I am and where I'm from, right now. They're 1,000 times more relevant than any coked out indie rock of the week that R5 is touting, and will be remembered as such. I was lucky enough to squeeze into their final Philly show on Friday (their last show was last night at Maxwell's in New Jersey) and scream along to selections from "Dork Rock" (the definitive punk album of my generation, no disputes), "Upstairs/Downstairs" and "Jersey's Best Prancers" (ironically, a reference to the eponymous Lifetime album previously mentioned) one last time. Despite the fact that the upstairs of the Khyber was too packed to even successfully lift one's arms, I felt strangely at home shoulder to shoulder with the NJ HC True Believers types as we pushed dangerously against Mikey Erg's bass drum. When their hour long set finally ended, I knew I had just experienced something that I'd remember for a long while; not the show in particular, but this band, and this time in my life.

underground disneyworld

The past month has had it's slight ups and slight downs. I turned 18, I got to vote, I played a pretty good show at Kennett's library. I rode the train a lot. I saw the Magnetic Fields and the Dead Milkmen. Jeez. Once I finished the album I took a significant break from songwriting (the last one I produced was way back in July). I've got a lot of ideas floating around though, it's all about just getting motivated enough to actually follow through with them. New Failed Attempts at Facial Hair songs by the end of the year, hopefully. I've gotten kind of tired of my repertoire.

Anyway, it is imperative that you attend December 5th's show. It's at 1004 Brandywine Street in Philadelphia (that's Mike V's house. Don't worry, it's safe). Dustin and the Furniture (North Carolina) and Toby Foster (Illinois) are playing and I'd like it if people came and threw them some cheddar for gas. Plus I'll hopefully have some new stuff written by then. All kinds of people are coming! Make new friends!

I've been really into the Gorilla Biscuits and Nuclear Assault recently. I aspire to get really proficient at guitar so I can play in a thrashy hardcore band one day and not get all cheesed on by metal dudes who think I suck. I've been reading American Hardcore and solidifying my hatred for everything that sounds like Sufjan Stevens. That's what's up. Expect another post next month.

pacey whitter's broken home

i've decided that if I ever have a house where I can do shows, that ^ is going to be the name of it.

I understand that it's been a while, but news regarding my music has been pretty stagnant lately. I haven't written a song since July and haven't played a show since august. But that will change soon: I'm playing at the Kennett High School library on 10/17, which should be cool, and though it's a long way off, I'm doing a show with Toby Foster at Mike V's house in philadelphia on 12/5.

I'll be in the city over the next couple of months for shows. Over the span of a month I'll be seeing Jonathan Richman, Japanther, the Magnetic Fields, The Dead Milkmen, Lemuria, The Ergs!, and Mischief Brew. My attendance to such soirees has been sparse this year, so I'm looking forward to making up for it.

I'll let you know if anything cool happens with FAaFh, but there might not be anything to say for a while.